Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Tony Almighty

This is a story that happened to me and my good friend a few years ago. It all started with her gorgeous, BIG cat named Tony. Tony looked like he had a good deal of Siamese in him. He was a very tall and good looking feline. Tony lived the good life for a long time and then finally died of old age. My girlfriend's family of four adult children had known Tony growing up and she wanted them to be present at the cat's funeral. So, until she could get them all together for the interment, Tony resided in a cardboard box in the big chest freezer in the basement.

Every so often I would ask, "Have you buried Tony yet?" and the answer was always, "No, not yet". This went on for quite some time. It was finally determined that Tony had been in the freezer for TWO years! Well, it's one thing to have a pet in the freezer until the spring thaw, but two years I thought was a little excessive!

I cornered my friend and suggested that it was time for Tony's body to be released. She readily agreed. Her kids were all over the country and it seemed impossible to find a time that would be suitable for everyone. So we set a time and a date when I would come over and help her to bury Tony.

On the appointed day, I showed up at her door, shovel in hand. She wasn't home. "Where is she?" I asked her husband. "Over at Jackie's" he replied. "Give me Jackie's number!" I ordered. I got her on the phone... "I have the cat. If you want to know where I'm burying him you had better get over here!" She pulled into the driveway moments later.

Digging was very difficult. The ground was hard and rocky. I pounded away until I had a substantial hole. Okay; now it was time to get Tony out of the freezer. I saw the box he was in and told my friend that the digging was so hard I didn't want to dig a bigger hole, so he had to come out of the box to bury him. He was perfect. He looked like he was sleeping. I joked that she could have sold him at the recent church sale as a cushion and no one would have known the difference. He smelled like strawberries. I wondered if any food in her freezer had picked up the flavour of cat. Into the hole he went.

As we stood there and said goodbye to Tony, we each threw a handful of dirt on the grave. All of a sudden there was a weird howling sound that shocked my friend and I and made the hair on the backs of our necks stand up and gave us goose bumps. Two cats had chosen that very time to yowl to each other... or was it to howl to Tony, the King of the Cats? My friend said, "They're singing him a hymn!" It was all very peculiar. We looked around but never saw the cats that made the loud howling.

And that is the story of Tony Almighty!


  1. Tony? Your kidding right?
    Interesting but sad because as you know i have a Tony. Your just getting me back because of that 'Kit' cat stereoview I showed you! Epic story elPresidente.

  2. Well, the cat's name was definitely Tony. But that's where the similarity ended! Your Tony is cute and stripey... and very much alive!

  3. Thanks El ... Was being my usual joker self. After all my Tony knows you as Auntie J and looks foreward to your visits.